Posts Tagged ‘Ashton Kutcher’
6 items.
Back on the clock again. Hope everyone is well.
Drawing today’s strip was weird. I was thrown all off my schedule. My wife was having this party Tuesday night at our house. And since Tuesday night is usually when I draw Wednesday’s strip, I need to put it together a day earlier.
It’s got me all messed up. I feel like this week is moving in reverse.
If there has every been a weird point of pride to being an Iowan, knowing someone like Ashton Kutcher can make it in Hollywood makes me feel a little better about being from The Hawkeye State.
I mean, you can kind of tell by looking at him that this is the kind of guy who probably coasted through high school on his looks and maybe isn’t all that bright. Really not too different from the character he plays on That 70’s Show. I mean, he dropped out of college to be an actor and was sweeping Cherrio’s dust at the General Mills plant in Cedar Rapids before being discovered. And this to me makes it all the more marvelous.
Keep in mind that Elijah Wood is also from Iowa. In fact, I think he came from Cedar Rapids, too. The talent scouts in that town must have it going on!
Regardless, you may be some backwater tyke with freaky big eyes and a disproportionate head, but one day, you could be the bearer of THE ONE RING. Something to think about.
I’m stepping out early on the blog today. Take it easy, everyone.
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Aug20
I don’t know if I’m going to get a negative reaction from today’s punchline or not. But there it is. Tossed out into the universe. We reap what we sow.
So it’s understood, blackface is a particularly shameful episode in American entertainment. The barrier of racism that prevented black actors from playing black characters – opting instead to put white actors in “blackface” makeup – is a concept I find disgusting.
Of course, the practice existed long before Al Jolson starred in Mammy back in 1930. Shakespear had male actors perform the parts of female characters in the late 1500’s. Greek performers were doing the same thing 500 B.C.!
I personally believe making fun of these kind of things helps break down the thought process that made them acceptable. Mel Brooks once spoke of making fun of Hitler in the same way. If you’re laughing AT him, his brand of ignorance and hatred is much less potent.
That said, Tara Reid really needs to lay off the eye-liner. It’s getting a little out of control, don’t you think?
Personally, I hope her latest film, My Boss’s Daughter lands with a colossal THUD. Since Ashton Kutcher is in the lead, he could stand to be taken down a few pegs. I’m getting a little tired of seeing his contorted face everywhere I turn – Iowa native or not.
I can see the headlines now: “My Boss’s Daughter stunk – Ashton Kutcher Punk’d!”
Goodness, I’m clever!… not.
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This is my prediction for Sunday night. Dan Rather, Peter Jennings, and Tom Brokaw will interrupt our scheduled programs to tell us, “Millions of Americans found themselves Punk’d this weekend after shelling out 8 bucks to see My Boss’ Daughter. Ashton Kutcher and Frankie Muniz plan on using the proceeds for a weekend getaway.”
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Jan23
EVERY TIME SOMONE IS PUNK’D, ASHTON GETS HIS WINGS
January 23rd, 2004 |
(5 votes, average: 8.60 out of 10)
I don’t know where the hell this comic came from today. Maybe it’s a commentary on Ashton Kutcher’s omnipresent profile. Maybe it’s a critique of his acting ability. Maybe I just felt like drawing another comic where Jared abuses celebrities. It’s abstract enough to be all three!
Well, if I’m being overly harsh on myself, sooth my dwindling self esteem by voting for Theater Hopper at BuzzComix and taking a gander at another incentive sketch. This one has class written all over it.
Even though I have Jared tagging Kutcher’s bean bag with ferocious velocity in today’s strip, I know for a fact that he’s going to see The Butterfly Effect when it opens in theaters tonight. If you know Jared at all, this should come as no surprise. He enjoys any movie with a trailer cut to look like a Nine Inch Nails video.
Of course, it’s not like I’m getting off scott free this weekend, either. I’m going out to see Win A Date With Tad Hamilton! – quite possibly the most ridiculous title for a movie in the last 5 years. This one stars Topher Grace, Kutcher’s co-star on That 70’s Show. Odd, don’t you think, that they would have movies competing with each other on the same weekend?
Still, if I was a betting man, I’d put my money on Topher to maintain a career past television. Getting your feature debut in Steven Soderbergh’s Traffic is a pretty good start. I mean, Ashton’s first high profile gig was Dude, Where’s My Car?
Dude… do the math.
My affinity for Topher aside (his name is just fun to say – Topher… like “gopher”), I’m not entirely sold on the idea that Win A Date With Tad Hamilton! will be any good. Still, it was directed by the same guy that made Legally Blonde, which I sheepishly admit to enjoying immensely. If he can find the same hidden spark in Kate Bosworth that they did with Reese Witherspoon, then he should have a nice little hit on his hands.
Then again, January is the post-Oscar dumping ground, so don’t hold your breath.
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I’m sorry, but I REALLY like today’s buzzComix incentive sketch (click here to vote if you want to see it). The sketch perfectly encapsulates a period of my life where I would come home from school, watch Thundercats, eat a Little Debbie snack cake and play Guess Who?! I’m tellin’ ya, this is the kind of stuff X-Entertainment covers in spades.
Although I think the joke is really obvious, I guess I don’t know how well it is going to go over with you guys. Some of you may have never played Guess Who?! or are too young to remember it.
The rules were pretty simple. Basically, you and your opponent grab one card from a deck and keep it hidden from each other. You then take turns asking each other questions about the picture on your opponent’s card in an attempt to figure out which individual specifically they are hiding from you.
In front of you is a little flip board with about 30 other characters. Using the process of elimination, you flip down the portraits that don’t fit the profile.
So if you ask your opponent, “Does your person have glasses?” and they say “No,” you flip down all of the faces wearing glasses.
Problem is, that glasses question would eliminate about half of the playing field. So games didn’t last very long.
Man, that was a little more long-winded than I anticipated. Wanna talk about movies? Let’s shall.
Cami is really excited to see Guess Who? this weekend and I can’t really figure it out. It doesn’t seem up her alley. She’s not a hardcore Bernie Mac or even an Ashton Kutcher fan, so I do not understand the appeal. To me, it looks like a lightweight sitcom interpretation of a far superior movie.
Honestly, what purpose is there to remaking 1967’s Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner? First of all, you’re not going to ever top a cast that included Spencer Tracy, Sidney Poitier and Katharine Hepburn – so don’t even try.
Second, the context of the original was perfectly metered. It took the delicate subject of race relations at the height of the civil rights movement and literally brought it to your dinner table. But it managed to do it with a light touch and, at times, comedically. No small task.
I have to think Sidney Poitier must be rolling his eyes at the proposition of a remake that will basically distill the concept down to “BLACK AND WHITE PEOPLE ARE DIFFERENT!” – to which the audience will reply with a thunderous “A-DUHHHHHHHH!” when the credits roll.
Seriously, if I wanted a bunch of jokes about the differences between the races, I could go to any comedy club and at least order a beer to go with it. All I know is if Ashton Kutcher starts riffing on how small the bags of peanuts airlines give you are, I’m walking out.
Oh, well. Methinks I doth protest too much. I’m going out with Cami tonight and her sister. We’ll have a grand ole time, I’m sure.
If you’re looking to have a grand ole time, you should really think about registering in the THorum and participating in this week’s Friday Five. It’s so simple your 6 year-old brother could do it. We ask you five questions, you answer them! It’s a great way to introduce yourself to the community and learn something about the people who already post there at the same time!
By the way, I know I haven’t been mentioning it much, but a week from now I will be in Kansas City with my good friends with Zach “The Maniac” Miller and Mitch “The Bitch” Clem at the Kansas City Comicon Comic Book Convention. We’ll be sitting on Artist’s Alley and you can’t miss us. I just ordered a giant 2′ x 4′ fire engine red banner with the Theater Hopper logo splashed across it. If you’re in the area, come down and say “Hi.” All three of us would appreciate it!
Talk to you guys soon! Hope everyone has a great weekend!
And no… Clem isn’t that bitchy. Just a little bit!… ;-D
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I always feel like I’m taking a risk by relying on a visual gag for the punchline of a comic. You never know how it’s going to play. But I was so much more interested in coming up with a list of fake names for Valentine’s Day, I decided to throw caution to the wind.
Incidentally, do you know how long it takes to make a high-res recreation of an IMDB page? Longer than it takes to draw, ink, color and shade two panels of this comic – I’ll tell you that much!
Obviously I’m having a little fun by suggesting Sgt. Slaughter is in Valentine’s Day. But as ridiculous as the cast list is for this thing, he might has well be.
Cami only gave you a sample of who shows up in this movie. Check out the names attached to this thing:
Jessica Alba, Kathy Bates, Jessica Biel, Bradley Cooper, Eric Dane, Patrick Dempsey, Hector Elizondo, Jamie Foxx, Jennifer Garner, Topher Grace, Anne Hathaway, Ashton Kutcher, Queen Latifah, Taylor Lautner, George Lopez, Shirley MacLaine, Emma Roberts, Julia Roberts, and Taylor Swift.
Those are 19 big names. A handful of these actors are Oscar winners! That’s ri-donk-ulous! What kind of dirt does director Garry Marshall have on these people to group them together in an American knock-off of Love, Actually? It’s scary how much clout that guy has. Must be carry-over from his days as a writer on Laverne & Shirley.
I was actually kind of open to the idea of seeing Valentine’s Day until I heard Garry Marshall was directing it. As a director, his work is all about schmaltz and playing it safe. Look at his directing credits over the last 10 years – The Other Sister, Runaway Bride, The Princess Diaries, Raising Helen, The Princess Diaries 2 and Georgia Rule. I look at these films and the women in the audience who he targets and cynically assume that he must think all women are stupid.
Critical reaction to Valentine’s Day has been overwhelmingly negative with a 16% rotten rating at Rotten Tomatoes as of this writing. If it is at all a success at the box office, it will be based on its star power and simplistic branding. “A movie called Valentine’s Day being released on Valentine’s Day weekend? I simply must go!” This is why I scold Rob Zombie for not getting his Halloween remakes released closer to Halloween. People will go because they feel like they’re supposed to go.
I don’t know the details of the film, but I think I know the premise. If it’s about Valentine’s Day, certainly it’s about finding love or that special someone on the titular day and the frustrations that come along with that.
Does anyone truly believe that Jennifer Garner or Bradley Cooper would have trouble finding a date on Valentine’s Day? I mean, MAYBE Topher Grace. But c’mon!
Cami and I haven’t talked much about the film, but I can kind of sense that she’s not interested in seeing it. Instead, for Valentine’s Day, we’re going to leave the kids with my folks and have a nice dinner. That’s going to be about it. That’s just fine with me!
What are your Valentine’s Day plans? Do you plan on seeing Valentine’s Day the movie? If so, is there a particular actor that drew you in? Do you feel the large cast of actors will be helpful or a hindrance to the movie? Leave your comments below!
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