I think if I didn’t make a joke about this weekend’s newest disaster flick, The Core, you would think that I was feeling ill.

Today’s comic reflects my opinion of the behind-the-scenes machinations that brought this atrocity to multiplexes nationwide.

The producers of The Core are about five years too late if they’re still trying to ride the wave of late 90’s disaster epics. What Independence Day wrought has long since subsided.

The plot alone is too ridiculous to take serious. It echoes a period in cinematic history where people thought radiation could make bugs huge.

…and this was scary.

The premise of The Core is that our government has implanted a weapon into the center of the Earth, using it to trigger earthquakes against enemy nations. Somehow, this “don’t fool with Mother Nature” brain fart causes the core to stop “spinning” (yeah, right) and then cause electro-magnetic super storms that ravage the surface. The only solution? To drill through the crust and destroy the machine with NUCLEAR WARHEADS, thus jump-starting the planet and returning everything back to normal.

I think anyone who buys a ticket to this movie should get a free swift kick in the ass with every purchase. Everything about this movie flies so flagrantly against everything we know about science..NAY! COMMON SENSE!… that anyone who aids it’s success during it’s theatrical run is effectively dumbing down the rest of the population by association.

Harsh words? You betcha. But it’s how I feel.

I’m very excited to go to Planet Comicon in Kansas City. I received an e-mail from someone else in the Des Moines area who said they were going, too. They even asked for a sketch if they bumped into me! That’s weird. Here I am prepping myself to get into total fanboy mode, and someone comes along telling me they dig what I do. Have I crossed the other side? Have I become one of… them?

Nah. I’m still gonna have Lou Ferrigno sign my forehead.

One last note: Aric over at Fish Strips is undertaking a huge new storyline where all of your favorite web comic all-stars are making cameos. Aric was cool enough to find room for both Tom and Cami, so you should check out his good work.

Aric has been laying low for a little while, but I’m totally digging his new direction. It’s good to see him jump back in with both feet!

Now, if only my character can catch a knife in the eye, I will know I have made it in life.