I’m not as blasé about Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides as I present myself in today’s comic. Actually, I’m kind of excited to see it. Cami is, too. Although, admittedly, I’m not excited for the reasons I’m probably supposed to be excited.

I guess I will say – at this point – Johnny Depp’s Keith Richards impression has worn a little thin on me.

I totally recognize that Depp has created an iconic film character – one that will be imitated (poorly) at Halloween parties for years to come. But that doesn’t mean I find it either as cute or charming as I once did.

Truthfully, the big draw for me is Ian McShane as Blackbeard. I’ve heard his role in the film is not pronounced, which is a shame. I mean, the man practically looks like a pirate by default. And he makes a great villain. Actually, he makes a great protagonist, too. He’s just great, okay!

Someone has got to fill the void Sean Connery left behind and I nominate McShane. Done! Written! One for the books!

The one thing the Pirates of the Caribbean movie have been exceptional about is characterization. Capt. Jack Sparrow, Barbossa, Davy Jones… even Norrington. Great characters, each.

Of course, leave Keira Knightley’s Elizabeth Swann and Orlando Bloom’s Will Turner out of the equation – which the fourth movie thankfully does – because they bore me to tears. I’m sure they have their fans. I’m just not one of them.

The Pirates of the Caribbean movies also have great production design. Amazing richness in detail – a stylized world I can believe in, a place I want to spend two hours in.

If the Pirates of the Caribbean movies have any failing is that they tried too hard to force continuity on the audience with the last two movies. They tried so hard to manufacture an epic legend, it ended up smothering the proceedings.

Of course it didn’t help that At World’s End devolved into a swirling cauldron of nonsensical special effects at the end. You could almost see Gore Verbinski looking at the dailies near the end and saying “I don’t know what the hell is going on anymore! THROW MORE MONEY AT IT!”

To that end, I’m glad that On Stranger Tides is more of a self-contained story. My hope is that it will recapture some of the pep of the first movie because the last two were completely exhausting to sit through!

With luck, Cami and I will be able to sneak out of the house sometime this week to check things out.

What about you? Have you already seen it? Also, why hasn’t the trailer for the new Muppet movie shown up online, yet? I demand answers!

Please feel free to leave your comments below!