C’mon. You didn’t think I was going to let the week slide by without taking some shots at our resident, Theater Hopper punching bag Ben Affleck did you?

If you REALLY want to see Jared blow his top, click here and vote for Theater Hopper at buzzComix to view the extra, incentive sketch.

Watching the trailers for Surviving Christmas, I don’t have much to complain about. The movie seems like a fairly harmless holiday confection where desperate people learn valuable lessons about themselves, their families and “THE MEANING OF CHRISTMAS” ™. A pleasant distraction.

TOO BAD THEY’RE RELEASING IT IN FRONT OF THE WRONG, STINKING HOLIDAY!

Halloween is two weeks away. What business does a Christmas movie have cluttering up the multiplexes, confusing the issue? The Grudge, I understand. Saw, I understand. Surviving Christmas… I do not understand.

DreamWorks, what are you thinking? I don’t remember a disconnecting in marketing this bad since Disney released The Santa Clause 2 on October 27, 2002.

All I’m saying is that Surviving Christmas better be really funny if it’s going to get over the hump of not one, but two holidays in two months before putting it’s intended target – Christmas – between its sights.

Will the movie even last that long in theaters? It could potentially be on video and on sale for the holidays before it even makes it to the celebration of its namesake!

I was going to extend compliments to the considerable talents of Affleck’s co-stars James Gandolfini, Christina Applegate and Catherine O’Hara. But at this point, I’m having trouble circumnavigating the absurdity of it all.