I was coming across my notes for my review this morning and I remembered a bitchy little comment I wanted to make that I didn’t add to the final review.
“Spider-Man is without his mask so often in this movie, the should have called it ‘Peter Parker 3’ instead of Spider-Man 3.”
Look, I realize that the first movie was raked over the coals for the totally Power Rangers-esque dialogue delivery between Green Goblin and Spider-Man during that scene on the rooftop. Lots of overexaggerated head bobs to indicate words were being spoken. I also realize that Tobey Maguire is a big star now and probably pushed for more face time. For an actor, it makes sense. But it just bugged the hell of out of me. Put on your damn mask! Staple it to your neck if you need to!
Also, can anyone explain to me what Captain Stacy and Gwen Stacy were doing at a certain someone’s funeral at the end of the movie? Were these characters ever introduced to each other? Sorry, stuck out like a sore thumb to me.
Also, total waste of James Cromwell as Captain Stacy and J.K. Simmons as J. Jonah Jameson. They were hardly in it at all. Another example of how this movie was stuffed to the gills, in my opinion – and in a bad way.
After seeing Spider-Man 3 this weekend, posting my review on Monday and weathering the 90+ comments and controversy it generated, I figured it was about time we got back to business and had a little fun with the comics again.
Real quick synopsis of the whole review thing – I feel it was a success. I mean, it was my first “official” review for the site and by “official” I mean “first review instead of a comic” and it really got people talking. Some people were totally on board with me – thanking me, even, for giving voice to the same frustrations they had with the film. Some people politely disagreed with me and pointed out holes in my logic. I was totally cool with that. Like I said, it was the first review and (admittedly) not the most well written. So I appreciate the opportunity for constructive feedback.
Then there was… the third category of responses. Wherein people reacted so violently against my review, they made sure to tell me the review sucked, that I personally sucked, that I knew nothing about comics, that Theater Hopper was never funny, the jokes have always been terrible, that I’m a poseur and I’m off their bookmarks list forever.
Ho-kay.
I don’t want to dwell on it too much, but that kind of criticism really caught me off guard. I mean, I know it’s the internet and there are always going to be people mouthing off. But I never understood the logic of someone who lashes out with every personal insult they can come up with because they disagree with you about a movie, or an album or whatever. I mean, unless you’re Sam Raimi, what’s effective about telling me how much I suck and that you’re never visiting the site again like I owe you something? That’s just being mean for no good reason. All the best to you, I guess. If you blow up like that over matters of opinion, I just hope you don’t end up kicking the cat or murdering someone when it’s about something that’s actually important!
That said, many thanks to those who left messages of support. Like I said, I was caught off guard by some of the comments, but I like the idea of doing more reviews because it really got people participating in the comments thread and, well… that’s kind of the point! So, don’t worry – a couple of sourpusses haven’t run me off from doing reviews! If anything, I’m going to take the experience and make sure the next review is that much better!
At any rate, to take a step away from that controversy, I wanted to do a comic that was pulled from real life. Orignally, this comic was supposed to go up on Tuesday with another new comic going up on Wednesday. But since I’m at home on vacation this week, I decided to space things out a little and stay true to the Monday, Wednesday, Friday schedule. So the comic that was originally meant for today will run Friday. Be sure to check it out!
Today’s comic was taken almost word for word from a conversation Cami and I had before going to see Spider-Man 3. Yes, I do own a t-shirt with the black costume logo on it and yes, I did wear it to the movie. Cami totally rolled her eyes and named checked PCU and my reply was as it is in the comic. Slimming lines were my best comeback.
Don’t believe me that I own the black costume logo shirt? Check it, true-believers!
That one is for all the haters that said I don’t know anything about comics!
I was psyched to see this movie and don’t let me dour review convince you otherwise. I mean, why else would a 30 year-old man dress up like this in public, let alone in public advertising “Yes, I am wearing a Spider-Man shirt to a Spider-Man movie? What of it?”
I was actually so excited to see Spider-Man 3 that I was totally suckered into buying the combo meal at the concession stand that came with a “collectible cup!” Any keepsake I could get my grubby little mitts on, y’know?
During the movie, I was totally amazed at how many parents brought their little kids with them. Cami and I caught an early matinee at 12:30 on a Sunday, so I’m sure that had something to do with it. But looking around, Cami commented on all of the kids and asked me “If Henry were a few years older, would you bring him to this movie.” I told her in all honesty, no, I wouldn’t. I mean, I know it’s technically a kids movie. Well, okay a kids AND geek movie. But it’s PG-13 for a reason, right? Plus, it’s got Venom in it and Venom used to freak me out when he was a flat drawing in a comic book. I could only imagine how much scarier he would be leaping toward you with the fangs and the spittle and whatnot. No way would I bring Henry to this movie if he was 5 or 6 years old.
But anyway, there we are, sitting in the movie surrounded by kids.
Some of it was cute. When Spider-Man was web-slining through the city, a little girl sitting next to Cami would lean over to her Mom and say “That’s dangerous!” Some of it was annoying. Like the other little girl over my right shoulder with her family of eight who would not. shut. up! At one point, one of the characters in the movie had a line of dialogue where they used the word “stupid.” This little girl went on and on asking her father if movies could use the word “stupid” – like it was a swear word or something.
Later on, immediately after the scene where Topher Grace is consumed by the Venom symbiote, the little girl is murmuring over and over “I want to go home. I want to go home.” I’m thinking to myself, “Great. Venom freaked her out and now she’s going to be scared out of her wits for the rest of the movie. Take her home already!”
No sooner do I finish that thought when I hear what sounds like a burp from the row behind me. Then another burp. Then a wet slap on the linoleum floor. Then the sickly smell of SweetTarts in the air.
The little girl threw up. Whoops! Should have listened to her, Dad!
What I found priceless was the reaction of the woman who was sitting a few seats over from me, roughly directly in front of the blast zone. She hunched her shoulders up and kind of brushed her shoulders gingerly, reluctantly feeling for trace elements of vomit on her sleeve. She kept looking over her shoulder like the second wave was coming.
It wasn’t long before the little girl and her family left the theater and I thought to myself “Yeah! Alright! No more talking during the movie!” Then I felt really bad about myself because I’m sure the family was embarrassed and the little girl probably felt terrible, too.
After the movie, Cami and I were walking out and she said “Can you believe that little girl threw up like that?” I looked back at her and said, “You know it’s going to happen to us one day.”
And it probably will.
At any rate, after the movie, we picked up Henry who was being watched by my parents and went home. We put Henry to sleep and I was left to quietly contemplate the movie as I outlined the review in my head. I looked to my “special edition collectors cup” I had purchased from the concession stand for inspiration, but drew nothing from it.
The rest is history.
Have a great Wednesday!
I don’t know exactly how to explain today’s comic except there is this weird lull in theaters this weekend between Spider-Man 3 coming out last week and Shrek the Third coming out next week. The only new high-profile release is 28 Weeks Later. Since I’m all about drawing Tom in the Spider-Man mask as much as possible, I decided on this weird little mash-up.
At least I know for some of you it will be weird. The comic book faithful knows there is already a precedence for a zombie Spider-Man and that would be in Marvel Comics popular maxi-series Marvel Zombies from early last year. Robert Kirkman – who is one of my favorite comic book writers – did a really excellent job with it and it has a really black sense of humor. As you can see, I’ve posted the cover to the second printing of the first issue so you could see where I picked up the visual reference.
Right now there is a very interesting Army of Darkness vs. Marvel Zombies crossover going on right now. So if you’re a fan of the Evil Dead movies (somewhat timely considering Sam Raimi’s involvement in that franchise as well as the Spider-Man franchise), you might want to stop by your local comic book store and pick it up.
As far as the comic goes. I’m happy with it. It gave me an opportunity to do some dramatic up-lighting, which I always enjoy. Plus, you got two full comics this week instead of one while I was on vacation. Can’t complain about that! Well, that is unless you’re one of the people who took my Spider-Man 3 review personally and vowed never to visit my site again. Because – let’s face it – you’re just looking for stuff to complain about!
Some of you with less serious opinions about comic book movies will be glad to know that I’m through covering Spider-Man 3. After today’s comic, we’re moving forward. I wish I had more to say about 28 Weeks Later, but I’m not sure where I stand on it.
The first movie was amazing. To take zombies and make them faster and more aggressive than a linebacker was such a simple move that worked out so well. It finally made zombies really, REALLY scary to me. And before anyone writes in and tries to correct me that “they weren’t zombies! It was a virus!” I know that. But let’s not kid ourselves. It was a zombie movie, okay. At any rate – excellent execution (no pun).
I never really understood the appeal of zombie movies before that. Shuffling around, and whatnot. Why are they a threat? I guess it was the thrill of taking one’s head off with a shotgun that people liked to see. Of course, the social commentary between zombies and mall culture in Dawn of the Dead was cool. But beyond that, what was cool or menacing about zombies? Their numbers? Their relentlessness? I’ve never been a big horror fan, so if anyone wants to take a stab (again, no pun) at explaining the appeal in the comments, I’m all ears.
As much as I liked the original 28 Days Later, I wonder if the sequel can live up to it’s predecessor. The rumor is that the producers threw a bunch of money at Cillian Murphy to reprise his role and (I think) have him come back as a zombie. Is that right? No dice, though because he turned them down.
I don’t really think that Murphy’s involvement is a requirement to make 28 Weeks Later a success. After all, there were no real big name actors in the first movie, so this one will probably do just fine. It just makes me wonder if that would have been an insurance policy of sorts for the producers or if it’s a sign that they don’t have faith in what they have script-wise.
For me it’ll be wait-and-see. I saw the first 28 Days Later on DVD. It’ll probably be the same for 28 Weeks Later. I’m too much of a wuss. I need to pause the movie and get a soda sometimes. I can’t do that in the theater. Oh, well.
Anyone out there planning on seeing it? What’s the agenda for the weekend? Leave your comments below and I’ll see you on Monday!