You may have heard by now that our favorite scruffy weasel Shia LaBeouf gave an interview to Details Magazine where he essentially bragged about banging Megan Fox on set while working with her on the first two Transformers movies.
If you missed it, here’s the key information:
Asked if he hooked up with Fox, LaBeouf nods affirmatively. “Look, you’re on the set for six months, with someone who’s rooting to be attracted to you, and you’re rooting to be attracted to them,” he explains. “I never understood the separation of work and life in that situation. But the time I spent with Megan was our own thing, and I think you can see the chemistry onscreen.”
When I inquire about Fox’s status at the time with her longtime boyfriend, Brian Austin Green, LaBeouf replies, “I don’t know, man. I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know. . . .”—repeating the phrase exactly 12 times with various intonations, as if trying to get it just right. Finally, he says, “It was what it was.”
Now, if you know me, you know that I am not a fan of Shia LaBeouf. Basically, I am of the mind that he has been parading around Hollywood for the last few years in his Big Boy pants trying to prove to anyone and everyone what a badass he is. Bragging that you nailed Megan Fox in a trailer somewhere on Paramount back lot basically lines up with this.
If that doesn’t jive with your interpretation of Shia LaBeouf, then sample this quote from the same article:
…there’s an upside to posing for the occasional mug shot. “I’ve noticed that since this ‘wild child’ s— has been posted on my head,” he says, “people seem a little more respectful.”
Mmm-hmm. We’re all fawning over how dangerous you are, you little imp!
Here’s the thing: I never really bought LaBeouf’s tough guy act and I’m certainly not buying it now. But I think I’m starting to understand it a little bit more. Especially his pathological need to “tell it like it is” in interviews.
Think about this guy’s career in the last 5 years. Between Transformers, Indiana Jones and Wall Street, he’s basically acting in movies where he’s the least interesting thing in them. He’s a cipher. No one wants to talk to him about his performance. People want to ask him what it’s like working with Harrison Ford, Oliver Stone, Michael Douglas or Michael Bay.
So what do you do? You start talkin’ smack. Why? Because it gets you headlines. People start talking about you again. You can the crazy nonsense you’re spouting. Watch cable news. Politicans pull this move ALL THE TIME.
Some people like to give LaBeouf credit for being honest. I like to call these people “self-hating movie fans.” They’re basically mad that they got duped into putting down good money for a lousy movie and cheer up only when someone behind the scenes pulls the curtain back to agree with them about how awful it was. It makes them feel validated. Meanwhile, the guy doing the “truth telling” gets to look like a hero.
But here’s the thing: It doesn’t take a lot of intestinal fortitude to say Transformers 2 sucked or Indiana Jones 4 sucked or Wall Street 2 sucked TWO YEARS AFTER THE FACT. You know, after your promotional obligations are over, after the critical and fan response has been factored in or after your paycheck has cleared.
My question is, “Would LaBeouf still be doing all this ‘truth-telling’ if fan reaction to those movies had been positive?” My guess is “probably not.”
Someone with integrity might look at the final cut of a bad movie they starred in and say “You know, this isn’t very good. I’m not comfortable promoting it.” Someone with discerning taste might look at a script and say “This is not for me. I should be doing movies with more substance.”
LaBeouf is not that guy. In the Details article he talks about how he passed on recent Oscar winners like The Social Network and 127 Hours.
He does talk about how he’s trying to be more choosy and is looking for roles that are “Warren Beatty—type game changers.” He also says he’s done with action movies. Apparently it creates “animosity from men.”
“They feel like they want to challenge me,” Labeouf shares. “‘I just f—ed up Shia LaBeouf!’ It’s a story you can tell, and I guess you’re cool for it.”
Which I guess kind of explains the Megan Fox bragging. Like that’s suddenly going to make him look cool to men he feels animosity from. Meanwhile, he’s shooting himself in the foot by alienating the only fanbase I’ve ever seen stick up for him – young women. I can’t imagine bragging about the women you’ve slept with will endear you to… y’know… women.
Shia LaBeouf is basically the Mark Hamill of Generation Y. A smarmy kid who stumbled upward into a giant franchise and got into a car accident at the apex of his appeal. Except, unlike Hamill, LaBeouf wreck just mashed up his hand and not his face. So that bought him a few more years.
He’s still got a heaping spoonful of humility coming his way. I’m looking forward to the next 20 years of his obscurity.
Okay, so it’s been a little more than two weeks since I updated. That’s really bad. But let me explain how it happened.
Basically, I got thrown for a loop by the 4th of July holiday last week. Didn’t really plan in advance and was exhausted after all the family activities and whatnot. That’s why there was no comic last Monday.
I thought I would be able to compensate and post a comic later in the week, but late-night work commitments pretty much drained me of my energy reserves in the evenings last week to the point that I was going to be early, completely wiped out.
I hoped to get back on track over the weekend, but I was once again laid low – this time by crippling illness. Fevers of 103, chills, vertigo, migraines, back pain, night sweats, fever dreams. I don’t know what I picked up, but whatever it was certainly took advantage of my weakened state. I was pretty much out of commission from Friday night until… well, I’m still not 100% at the moment.
I went to a walk-in clinic on Saturday. They couldn’t confirm if I had a viral or bacterial infection. But they put me on antibiotics anyway. Then I went home and slept for 16 hours. It was tortured sleep, that much I can say – punctuated by thunderstorms, which made it all the more exhausting.
So, yeah. Last week? Not a great week.
I will also admit to a certain lack of confidence in this comic’s punchline. Frankly, the comic doesn’t stand very well on it’s own unless you know Jared’s long and sorted history with Shia LaBeouf.
I’ll also admit to a little bit of selfishness. I thought if I could extend the Shia-hate for a week, I could run this ad (or actually, a variation of that ad) on a few web sites to help draw eyeballs to the site. I have no doubt it would have worked. I just had way too much on my plate last week and prioritized things very, very poorly.
But you know what? I’m not going to beat myself up about it anymore. I was already sick with some kind of infection and started to make myself even sicker with guilt. I just have to dust myself off, say “sorry” and move on. Next week, bigger and better things await, right?
Hey, it can’t all be Chaucer.
Due to an e-mail snafu that kept me from being notified about an interview I did at Emerald City Comic Con, I’m sharing this with you kind of late. But I wanted to let you know about the video interview I did with 20 Sides of Nerd. I think it turned out well. You can watch it here.
Incidentally, if you want to check out ANY of the press I’ve done in the last 10 years, I have a hand archive of that on the site under the “ABOUT” tab.
Click this link for easy access.
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Oct 28, 2009 | AN INTERVIEW FOR YOU TO READ |
Nov 20, 2009 | KICKSTARTER UPDATE |
Mar 23, 2009 | NIC CAGE – ACTOR |