What is this strange disease that has taken grip on our protagonist? It’s OSCAR FEVER and it is intensifying! If you want to see how Tom makes it through the other side, you’ll need to be here on Friday!
Every year I get sucked into the same trap. At some point in February, they roll out the Oscar nominations and every year I roll my eyes because they didn’t nominate actor “x” or picture “y”. But then, as the ceremony date rolls near, I get all giddy like a crack-addled monkey making my predictions and spouting off my theories on who should win and why.
I think a lot of it has to do with certain media outlets that craft their coverage so cannily, I cannot help but to fall beneath their sway. Entertainment Weekly is a prime example of this. They handicap the odds of the big nominees. Reading that stuff makes you feel like you actually understand the backwards cluster of Hollywood politics – like you’re a friggin’ “insider”, or something.
In the end, it’s all just fodder for small talk – a way to make you appear more in the loop than others. At least until next year.
Talking about my excitement for the Oscars seems especially moot at this point in history. I’m sure if you watch the news or, y’know… occasionally pick up a newspaper, you’re well aware of the state of the world right now. Talking about some stupid award being given to some overpaid actor may seem downright shallow and close-minded by comparison.
But let me put this in perspective for you.
I watch the national news every day and every day I read a newspaper. At night, I flip between the different cable news outlets. I like to think myself as a member of the world community and choose not to shut myself off from it. True, part of my daily information consumption is entertainment “news”, but I readily digest the stuff that matters. I would suggest everyone do the same.
But that being said, I’m not going to weigh down the site with speculation about the impending war – what it means, what it will do to our relationships with other countries or how it has emasculated the U.N. to the point of ineffectiveness.
It’s my understanding that this site was created as a diversion from such things. I want to entertain you, so why bog you down with these things that don’t relate?
It’s just… well, war is pretty serious stuff. I don’t want you to think I’m ignoring it. But if you’re coming here to add a little levity to your day — even for a few minutes — then I wanted you to know I’m committed to providing that.
For all those who serve or knows someone who does, may this conflict be over quickly and with a minimal amount of casualties — on both sides.
Since we’re giving a nod to Garfield today, I thought it would be fun to illustrate what it might look like if a bipedal, walking cat existed in the real word for today’s incentive sketch. Click away to uncover the result.
I’m taking the piss out of Bill Murray a little for collecting a fat paycheck for his voice over work on the forthcoming Garfield movie that comes out Friday. I guess I just find it interesting when critically hailed performers take their momentum and throw the emergency break by following up with a commercial picture.
Halle Berry did it with Die Another Day and the “so-much-negative-buzz-it’s-radioactive” Catwoman after being the first black woman to win the Best Actress Oscar. Bill is doing it with Garfield post Lost in Translation. I can only assume these decision are made while in some kind of drunken stupor.
Ironically, Murray will probably be the only performer to emerge from the bloodbath that will be Garfield at the box office because he is the only “name” actor that doesn’t appear on screen.
To put it another way, say a little prayer for Breckin Meyer and Jennifer Love Hewitt.
To make a Garfield movie this late in the game is ludicrous to me. They should have made this flick 10 years ago when everyone was lugging around those suction cup Garfield dolls in the back of their Toyota Camary’s.
Why the delay? And I swear if anyone tells me it was so they could wait for the technology to catch up with their vision I will murder Jim Davis with mind-bullets.
You can tell no thought went into this movie. Why on Earth would you choose to animate Garfield with computer generate effects, but cast his canine foil Odie with a live action dog? This movie has already broken the rules established for its universe and already I’m angry about it.
Nevertheless, Cami insists we’ll be seeing the film this Friday when it opens. Every time one of those awkwardly paced commercials comes on TV, she blurts out “We’re TOTALLY seeing that!”
I think she’s just saying that to poke fun at me a little. She’s already been on the receiving end of this rant a couple of times…
Quick bit of site news: If you could be so kind to check out our newest sponsor Please Rewind, I would be forever grateful. This is a splendidly written and drawn web comic about a couple of guys who own a video store, so you know already it’s going to be up your alley. Man, if I had a dollar for every time I ran into a character like Hank Burns I’d be a rich man…
That’s it for now. Sign up for the THorum if you haven’t already. We’ve been seeing a lot of activity in there lately. Get in on the ground floor!
Have a great Wednesday!
IT’S A WONDERFUL THING TO LORD OVER EVERYONE ELSE
November 29th, 2004 | by Tom









(5 votes, average: 8.60 out of 10)
Sitting down to watch It’s A Wonderful Life to kick off the holiday season is probably a tradition most families share. That was certainly the case in Cami’s household. They treat is as the pinnacle of holiday entertainment. Cami even has several books about the movie and its history.
And while I’m a big Jimmy Stewart fan, watching It’s A Wonderful Life at my house just wasn’t as big a deal. So, since being married to Cami almost 5 years ago, she has included me into her tradition. While I enjoy it, the film still raises questions for me.
Like most Frank Capra films, there are too many convenient twists in favor of the protagonist. Things end a little too neatly. What happens to these characters afterwards? There is no resolution…
* THE REST OF THIS BLOG POST WAS LOST WHEN THEATER HOPPER WAS MOVED TO WORDPRESS IN JANUARY 2009 *
TMZ posted footage of actor Shia LaBeouf getting knocked to the ground by some hairy, shirtless dude outside of a bar in Vancouver. Although, truthfully, most of the video is of LaBeouf getting talked down by his bros before he decides to engage in any more fisticuffs.

Shia’s looks pretty drunk in the video. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen someone who has had a few too many try to clumsily extract themselves from the grasp of a friend who is trying to keep them from getting their head caved in. If that’s the case, it makes it a little difficult to cheer for the comeuppance I feel he’s due for. Make it a fair fight, at least.
That said, the wave of schadenfreude that took over Twitter when the news broke pretty much reflects what I believe is the general consensus – “People don’t like Shia LaBeouf.”
This coupled with the news that LaBeouf won’t be back for the next two Transformers sequels they’re filming back-to-back (Jason Statham is rumored to be the replacement), it’s been a pretty interesting week in Shia-related news.
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