Posts Tagged ‘conflict’
3 items.
Most people would probably be upset to have all of their laundry strewn across the floor, but Dewey makes michief fun! Even though we know the terrible truth about him!
Man, Dewey’s a jerk!
I hope you’re enjoying the arc so far. I’m gonna tie things up next week by actually getting the characters into – y’know… A MOVIE THEATER? Oh, oh! And making MOVIE REFERENCES! And guess what? I’ll even tie it back into King Kong. Yes, Virgina. There is a Santa Claus.
Speaking of the petulant ape, tuns out Peter Jackson’s opus only earned $9.7 million on it’s opening day. Remember those nay-sayers that wanted to see Jackson fail? Maybe they’re getting their wish?
$10 million on a Wednesday is nothing to sneeze at, but for a movie supposedly as large as this one having the advertising behind it that it does, that’s kind of a surprise. It ranked 21st on the all-time list for Wednesday openings. Universal was looking for Kong to do about $80 to $90 million in business over the first five days. Now they’re lowering their estimates around $55 to $65 million.
Rumor has it that Kong is having trouble attracting women, which makes sense to me. In my mind, monster movies typically occupy the same head-space in men where the Three Stooge’s and baseball statistics go. Are there any women readers out there that would either like to confirm or deny these theories? As always, we talk about the newest movies in the THorum.
I have a sneaking suspicion that the 3 hour running time has also been keeping people away. At least until the weekend. People lead hectic lives, made even more hectic by the holiday season. If you had 3 hours to kill on a Wednesday night, would you use it to see a giant monkey picture or to round up the last few presents for friends and family?
Or… y’know. Volunteer at a soup kitchen, or whatever.
Either way, it’s not like summer where people can kind of blow off work to see Star Wars: Episode III and their obligations aren’t as stacked up. Kong will do just fine over the course holiday, especially this last weekend before Christmas. People will be out in force in the nation’s malls, running around like idiots when they’ll say, "Man, I could really use a break. Wanna go see a movie? King Kong? 3 hours? PERFECT." Sites like The Drudge Report have prematurely labeled the film "King Bomb." They’ll be proven wrong.
Incidentally, what business does The Drudge Report have reporting movies? Slow day at the office, guys?
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For the record, I have to state that I do not PERSONALLY think Orson Welles is a failure. But in order to create conflict and move the plot forward, I have to put comic-Tom in an aggressive stance and have him say something inflammatory to provoke our guest – Brian Carroll from Instant Classic.
Comic-Tom is taking the short view on Welles’s career. One mired by depression, morbid obesity and borderline alcoholism. All of which are handily (sadly) represented in these infamous out-takes from a commercial Welles did for California Champagne company Paul Masson.
Of course, it doesn’t help that the most visible representation of Welles in the last 15 years comes from this parody piece from The Critic. Which, I have to admit, played a role in defining Welles as a individual for me several years before I studied him or even knew who he was…
This, of course, being a satirical twist on the also infamous audio outtakes from a radio spot Welles did for a company that sold frozen peas.
Think about this for a minute: The director of what is argued to be The Greatest Motion Picture of All Time arguing with some marketing guy about the copy he’s being paid to read in a frozen peas radio commercial. It’s just… bizarre.
Of course, these late-career foibles are easy to reach for when you’re trying to make an argument against Welles and his impact. Personally, I think he was a genius. If maybe a genius who got in his own way a little too often.
But put it in context. If you made Citizen Kane and followed up with The Magnificent Ambersons, I think that means you pretty much get a free pass career-wise for the rest of your life. Those were two big, important, stylistically rich films that everyone not only needs to see, but to own. It’s important film history – work the set the template for countless films that followed.
There’s a reason everyone recognizes “Rosebud,” even if they don’t know what it means.
I don’t know if I would have been compelled to add this disclaimer under normal circumstances. But I’ve already gotten a few people writing to ask “Why do you hate Orson Welles.” I don’t hate Orson Welles. I think he’s awesome. I’m just sacrificing my comic avatar for the sake of moving the plot forward.
I think I’m going to wrap up this story line on Wednesday, so be sure to come back for that. Afterwords, it’ll be back to making fun of what’s currently in theaters!
See you then. Have a great day, everyone!
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Okay, so it’s been a little more than two weeks since I updated. That’s really bad. But let me explain how it happened.
Basically, I got thrown for a loop by the 4th of July holiday last week. Didn’t really plan in advance and was exhausted after all the family activities and whatnot. That’s why there was no comic last Monday.
I thought I would be able to compensate and post a comic later in the week, but late-night work commitments pretty much drained me of my energy reserves in the evenings last week to the point that I was going to be early, completely wiped out.
I hoped to get back on track over the weekend, but I was once again laid low – this time by crippling illness. Fevers of 103, chills, vertigo, migraines, back pain, night sweats, fever dreams. I don’t know what I picked up, but whatever it was certainly took advantage of my weakened state. I was pretty much out of commission from Friday night until… well, I’m still not 100% at the moment.
I went to a walk-in clinic on Saturday. They couldn’t confirm if I had a viral or bacterial infection. But they put me on antibiotics anyway. Then I went home and slept for 16 hours. It was tortured sleep, that much I can say – punctuated by thunderstorms, which made it all the more exhausting.
So, yeah. Last week? Not a great week.
I will also admit to a certain lack of confidence in this comic’s punchline. Frankly, the comic doesn’t stand very well on it’s own unless you know Jared’s long and sorted history with Shia LaBeouf.
I’ll also admit to a little bit of selfishness. I thought if I could extend the Shia-hate for a week, I could run this ad (or actually, a variation of that ad) on a few web sites to help draw eyeballs to the site. I have no doubt it would have worked. I just had way too much on my plate last week and prioritized things very, very poorly.
But you know what? I’m not going to beat myself up about it anymore. I was already sick with some kind of infection and started to make myself even sicker with guilt. I just have to dust myself off, say “sorry” and move on. Next week, bigger and better things await, right?
Hey, it can’t all be Chaucer.
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