Archive for January, 2010
20 items.
I kind of had a hard time compiling my list for the Top 10 Movies of 2009 because 2009 was kind of a lackluster year and very few movies stuck out to me.
So, as I was going month-by-month through 2009’s releases on IMDB, I decided to write down ALL of the movies I saw this year and rank them accordingly. I ended up seeing 37 movies this year – not bad for a guy with a 2 year-old. For your entertainment, I am posting 11 – 37 here. Enjoy!
- District 9
I admired the movie for it’s craft and inventiveness. But the squalor of a South African shanty town was so oppressively authentic, it’s not a place I ever want to visit again. - Adventureland
A very relaxed and personal “coming of age” movie that isn’t strictly about getting laid. I mean, that’s part of the movie. Just not the only part. Killer soundtrack, too. - Away We Go
Sam Mendes, John Krasinski and Maya Rudolph aren’t names you would see billed together under normal circumstances, but this isn’t normal romantic comedy. More of a road movie than chick flick, its simple lessons about family and maturity stay with you long after the credits roll. - Crank: High Voltage
In all honesty, this film is straight up garbage. Grossly violent, racist and sexist. But I admired the film for what it laid on the line. It’s pretty much daring you to hate it and doesn’t care if you do. - Public Enemies
An oasis in the middle of the summer – a smart film for adults! Another charming rouge from Johnny Depp. If only Michael Mann hadn’t chosen to shoot it in digital video! - Angels and Demons
The addition of Ewan McGregor and the subtraction of Tom Hanks’s mullet make this follow up to 2006’s The DaVinci Code more enjoyable than the original. - Whip It
Another boilerplate story about an awkward girl trying to shake off the shackles of her dusty, boring town. But first-time director Drew Barrymore gets points for bringing something new to table – the culture surrounding roller derby leagues. Who knew I would find it so interesting!. - It’s Complicated
Normally I avoid Nancy Meyers and her films about cavernous kitchens, stocked high with copper kettles like the plague. But the combined charms of Meryl Streep, Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin made this one a winner. - Watchmen
One of 2009’s most hotly anticipated movies. Zack Snyder brought impeccable attention to detail and solved the squid problem from the original graphic novel. Yet, at the same time, I felt strangely disconnected from the experience. - Where The Wild Things Are
Spike Jonze’s love letter to childhood packs an emotional wallop with it’s ending, but the rest of it feels like a hazy dream. - Julie & Julia
Meryl Streep and Stanley Tucci deliver fascinating performances as Julia and Paul Child that make them feel like historical characters of importance. Amy Adams is shamefully wasted, forced to turn off her effervescence to play a damp dishrag of a character. - Monsters Vs. Aliens
Monsters, aliens and animation. My inner 6 year-old thanks you, Dreamworks. - Ponyo
The layered fluidity of the animation in Hayao Miyazaki’s modern reinterpretation of The Little Mermaid was astonishing. But damn if I could follow the plot. - Earth
Granted, this is basically repackaged footage from the excellent BBC/Discovery Channel documentary Planet Earth. But it looked amazing on the big screen and was a fairly optimistic cinematic journey about the nature of things. - The Proposal
A romantic comedy done right. Likable stars, a large and easily recognizable supporting cast and just enough quirks to make it cute. - Funny People
I wanted this movie to be better than it was. The first half about Seth Rogen and his ascent as a struggling comedian in Los Angeles is intriguing. The second half about Adam Sandler’s comedy superstar – despite having recovered from a bout with cancer – is depressing. The movie’s major failing is that it’s basically asks you to root for Sandler as he tries to break up the marriage of a former girlfriend. - The Goods: Live Hard, Sell Hard
This film wanted to be the next Anchorman or Walk Hard, but is sunk under the weight of Jeremy Piven’s bloated ego. If this movie had been made before Entourage, maybe we would have had something. Instead, watch this movie for the cavalcade of comedy stars in their supporting roles. - A Christmas Carol
A fine retelling of the Dicken’s classic. But the trappings of Zemeckis’s motion-capture animation was distracting. I was more interested in Jim Carrey, Colin Firth and Gary Oldman performing in the flesh. - Ninja Assassin
It’s been a long time since I’ve seen a straight-up ninja movie. This one is serviceable if you ignore Rain’s terrible acting. Even if it does insist on making these ancient warriors more like supernatural shadow-crawling boogeymen. - The Time Traveler’s Wife
This weepy chick flick leaves you questioning Eric Bana’s time-traveling ability than it does resolving any of the emotional subtext. - Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
I’ve seen all 6 Harry Potter movies and not one of them is memorable. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince continues this tradition. - G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra
A lumbering, stupid summer action flick summed up perfectly in the slack-jawed gaze of it’s star – Channing Tatum. But it manages to keep a little bit of the wonder from the 1980’s cartoon by being a cartoon itself. - X-Men Origins: Wolverine
After 3 X-Men films, Hugh Jackman has Wolverine down cold. It’s the rest of the movie that lets him down. Too many characters, several continuity editors, the bastardization of fan-favorite Deadpool and Wil.I.Am added to the cast makes this movie one of the biggest misfires of the year. - Terminator Salvation
A bleak – if slick – post-apocalyptic trek deeper into the Terminator mythology Someone needs to tell Christian Bale to knock it off with the gravely Batman voice. Cool to see a T-800 in up close and extended combat during the film’s climax. But I left the theater with an overwhelming feeling of “so what?” - Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian
It’s hard to be overly critical about a movie meant for kids. But why does a movie about The Smithsonian make me feel dumber after having watched it? - Brüno
Sacha Baron Cohen tries to expose the ignorance of homophobia with his over-the-top fashionista character Brüno but instead makes homophobia look justifiable when Brüno tries to dry-hump Ron Paul or walks into a redneck’s tent buck naked on a hunting trip. The film’s contempt for its audience is palpable. Worst of all, it’s simply not funny. - Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
Michael Bay takes everything I hated about the original Transformers and multiplies it by 10. Louder, dumber and less comprehensible. This movie would be completely forgettable if it weren’t for the racist caricatures applied to new additions Skids and Mudflaps. Worst movie of the year. How bad? Not only am I angry that I saw it, I’m annoyed that I have to write a recap of it.
So, there you have it! Every movie I saw this year packaged up in a bow.
Agree? Disagree? Leave your comments below!
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The inspiration for this comic hit me like a lightning strike. I wish I could figure out where it came from. My best explanation is that the most immature part of my brain was feeling neglected, sparked off and said “Hey! Pay attention to me!” Please enjoy the schoolyard limerick it conjured up for you.
I told Cami about the joke in today’s comic and she said she had never heard the phrase “He Who Smelt It, Dealt It.” At first I was surprised. But then I remembered she was never an 8 year-old boy and would have no context for such things. Nor the immaturity to appreciate it’s linguistic simplicity.
There’s something regal about the phrase, don’t you think? I wouldn’t be entirely surprised to find it as a passage in a joke Bible, for example. I don’t know. Maybe it’s just me.
I do find it curious that The Book of Eli has been dumped in the middle of January. Usually the post-holiday months are where studios jettison the projects they have the least amount of faith in. So why have Denzel Washington and Gary Oldman been relegated to the trash heap?
Apparently the critics aren’t on board with it, which is a shame because it’s directed by The Hughes Brothers – The guys who brought us Menace 2 Society and From Hell. Can you believe From Hell came out nearly a decade ago? That was the last time The Hughes Brothers had a movie in theaters. Wild.
Part of me wants to see the movie based on pedigree alone. That’s pretty much what convinced me to walk through the door for It’s Complicated. But at the same time, I kind of want to gather consensus from friends who have seen it to determine if it’s any good. I have kind of a natural avoidance to movies set in post-apocalyptic future because they all look alike to me. If I’m going to see The Book of Eli, I need to be given some hint of a twist.
What about you? Any plans to see The Book of Eli this weekend? What’s attracting you to this film? Is it the story, the characters or the actors? What was the last movie you saw based on the casting alone? Leave your comments below!
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Your ability to understand or appreciate today’s comic relies entirely on whether or not you watched Saturday Night Live this weekend with host Sigourney Weaver.
If you’re at all confused by the punchline, watch this video to be brought up to speed.
As you can see, I’m really aiming for jokes that will stand the test of time after this video’s viral status has faded.
I think I may have accomplished making this comic both topical and obscure at the same time.
Of course, last night was The Golden Globes. Usually I don’t pay too much attention to the Golden Globes because I don’t really care what the Hollywood Foreign Press has to say about, well… anything! But I was interested to see how Ricky Gervais would handle himself as host and was also looking for some kind of trend in terms of what movies might be nominated for Oscars this year. I was particularly interested in the latter considering that the Academy has opened up the field for Best Picture to 10 nominees. Could The Hangover’s win for Best Motion Picture – Comedy Or Musical have any bearings on Oscar nominations? We have to wait and see, I guess.
Incidentally, I live-blogged the event last night and you can read the entire transcript here. I’m using an application called Cover It Live which allows readers to participate in the conversation. I think it went really well. We had a really strong turn out despite very little advance notice. So I will definitely have to promote the fact that I’m live blogging for the Oscars.
If you don’t want to read two hours of snark, here are some of my highlights and lowlights from last night’s show.
- Mo’Nique’s acceptance speech – Maybe I’m just over the hype Precious has generated for itself, but the speech that others found uplifting, I found self-important and a pretentious way to start the evening.
- Martin Scorsese wins the Cecil B. DeMille Award – I kind of thought Hollywood was finished giving Scorsese gold watch awards after The Departed, but their montage of his films made me want to sit down and watch every single one of them in order – even Kundun. Of course, then they had to ruin it by making it a big advertisement for Shutter Island. Aw, who am I kidding? I’ll still go see it. It looks like a great Hitchcockian thriller and I was smitten listening to Scorsese talking about film preservation. Seriously!
- Glee wins Best Television Series – Comedy Or Musical – Sorry, I’m not a fan and you’re not going to convince me that Glee was any better than 30 Rock this season or any other. Where was all the love for prime-time musicals when Cop Rock was on the air?
- Ricky Gervais as host – I thought he got in a good dig on Mel Gibson as someone who “likes to have a drink from time to time,” but found him classless for plugging his HBO series at the end of the show before dashing away from the podium.
- Up wins Best Animated Feature Film and Best Original Score – Motion Picture – I was legitimately thrilled when I saw Up win for Best Animated Feature… until I remembered Fantastic Mr. Fox was up for the same role. (Maybe I should flip my last two picks for the Top 10 of 2009…) There was no disputing Michael Giacchino’s win for Best Original Score – one of the most emotional and effective of the year.
- Christoph Waltz wins Best Performance by an Actor In A Supporting Role for Inglourious Basterds – Another gimme. If Waltz doesn’t win a Best Supporting Oscar, I’ll be shocked. The man speaks 4 languages in his performance!
- Jason Reitman looked pissed when he lost Best Picture to Avatar – Go back and watch the tape. He looked livid.
- James Cameron speaks in Na’vi – During his acceptance speech for Best Director, Cameron came precariously close to the pretentiousness that killed any remaining good will I had for Titanic after his boastful “I’m the king of the world” Oscar acceptance speech in 1998. Also note that he didn’t thank any of the fans who helped push Avatar to nearly half a billion dollars in box office domestically.
- Robert Downey Jr. wins Best Actor – Comedy or Musical – I was convinced Matt Damon would win for his work in The Informant! That’ll teach me to bet against RDJ, who delivered one of the most entertaining speeches of the night.
- Jeff Bridges wins Best Actor – Drama – Another upset, as I was sure George Clooney would win for Up In The Air. I had a cursory interest in seeing Crazy Heart. Now it’s at the top of my “must see” list.
- Beards – Between Jon Hamm, Christoph Waltz sporting beards and William Hurt looking like Rutherford B. Hayes, what was up with all the facial hair last night?
Anyway, that’s my take on the Golden Globes. Did any of you watch last night? What did you think about the broadcast? What were your favorite moments? What were your least favorite moments. Leave your comments below!
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Hey, guys. I’m trying to make a push for Theater Hopper through Reddit and wanted to let you know that a link to Monday’s comic can be found here. If you have a Reddit account, please give the link a few thumbs up or a comment to help it move up the list a little bit.
In the past, I would submit to Reddit’s main area with very little luck. But this time I’m testing out links to Reddit’s sub-category for comics under http://www.reddit.com/r/comics/. I think it will help to actually target people who WANT to read comics for a change.
By the way, if you submit one of Theater Hopper’s comics to Reddit’s Comics category, please let me know so I can promote the link here.
I would submit my own links to Reddit, but they’re pretty savvy about people who try to self-promote. I feel this approach kind of splits the difference between an authentic representation of word-of-mouth on your part and callous marketing on my part.
Whatever works, right?
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For the record, neither one of my grandmothers has an opinion about Barack Obama as President. They’re both dead.
I don’t mean to disparage their memory by being so blunt about it. But I wanted to clarify that I don’t actually have a racist grandmother. Sometimes the comic weaves in and out of autobiographical elements and this is one of those cases where it’s just a joke.
Incidentally, if either of them were alive, I don’t think they would upset about an African American President.
I’m kind of getting into a bad habit where I’m referencing videos in the blog post to help sell the jokes in the comic. But for your own edification, you need to see the red band trailer for the Paul Bettany angels-gone-rogue action film Legion.
WARNING: The language is a little salty and not safe for work.
Watching this trailer reminds me of cheesy action movies from the 80s. I don’t know if it’s the remote desert diner location, but I was immediately reminded of Maximum Overdrive when I first saw this. Also, the music is vaguely reminiscent of the first Terminator to me.
Am I the only one seeing this?
Maybe it’s the abundance of guns. Dennis Quaid’s character actually calls Paul Bettany’s character “Rambo” at one point. But, yeah… The end of the world? God’s army of angels? What does this movie need?… I know! GUNS AND EXPLOSIONS!!
Even though the stringy albino frame of Paul Bettany would be the last one I would run to for protection in the Apocalypse, I believe his detached British charm and dry delivery are the only things lending credibility to this film. It’s almost if he’s communicating “Look, I know this movie is crap, but I’m going to take it seriously.” You have to respect his conviction. Never in my life did I think I would write “Paul Bettany” and “action star” anywhere in the same paragraph.
What do you guys think of Legion? Cheesy fun or bloated action cliches with a Biblical theme? Is Paul Bettany credible as an action star? Also, does anyone have a racist grandmother they want to talk about?
KIDDING! JUST KIDDING ON THAT LAST ONE!
But seriously, leave your comments about Legion below.
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I was looking at the poster for The Tooth Fairy trying to think of a joke that wasn’t completely obvious – when it occurred to me that we have two new movies in theaters this weekend with winged protagonists.
Okay, okay. Paul Bettany’s Michael from Legion is a fallen angel who cuts off his own wings, but you know what I mean. It’s kind of a weird coincidence, don’t you think?
And seriously, what is up with making Paul Bettany a bad-ass and sticking The Rock in a piffle of a kids movie? I understand this softening of action heroes is a great way to reach a new audience, but The Rock hasn’t kicked ass on screen since when? Doom? That was five years ago. Does that even count?
Remember when The Rundown came out and there was that passing-of-the-torch moment between The Rock and Arnold Schwarzenegger? Does anyone feel like The Rock has been given the opportunity to live up to that promise? Because I certainly don’t.
Look, I get it. The Rock has charisma. You can plug him into virtually any scenario and he makes it work. That’s why he’s in been in movies like Be Cool and Planet 51. I get it.
But can we mix in a few more action roles? Because The Tooth Fairy looks suspiciously like The Game Plan from a few years ago – a hard-nose, selfish sports guy learns about life and love through an unusual set of circumstances. They’re practically typecasting him at this point. Just my .02 cents.
Incidentally, as it relates to the comic, this isn’t the first time I’ve suggested a mash-up between films. Check out this jem from 2002 when I suggested they combine Star Trek: Nemesis with Maid In Manhattan. HILARIOUS!
That’s about all for me today. Are any of you planning on seeing The Tooth Fairy? Who thinks The Rock makes a better action star than a family film star? Is anyone aching to see The Rundown 2? Leave your comments below!
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This wasn’t the comic I had planned on making 24 hours ago. Originally, I had something else in mind. That is, until I saw part of Brian Carroll’s Instant Classic over the weekend where he had introduced a new character. In his words, a “large, jockish, ignorant, sexist Bostonian version of Tom Brazelton from his comic Theater Hopper.” The Jay Leno jaw was a nice touch.
He also made his version of my character the boyfriend of one of his leads. So that means the Instant Classic version of Tom might be around for a while. As a matter of fact, he’s already appeared in a second comic, so you might want to check that out as well.
Brian totally nailed me with the first comic where IC-Tom talks about seeing a movie with Jared. “Actually, we didn’t even see a movie,” he says. “We just saw a poster for it in the lobby and made fun of it for a while.” Zinger received, sir.
You might get a little more mileage out of this mock-beef if you know a little bit about Brian as a person. I would share details here, but I don’t want to misrepresent him further than what I’m doing with this comic. The Orson Welles worship is something I think he would cop to, though. ;D
It’s all in good fun, of course. No animosity. Again, in Brian’s words, “Of course I don’t think Tom’s a bad guy – this is more to the tune of the celebrity guests on Extras where they play grotesque versions of themselves.
I think that’s a clever approach and one I would kind of like to explore. But at the same time, it’s weird. Because MY version of myself is already a grotesque caricature. Bending that image through the lens of another artist’s vision makes things even more bizarre and twisted. How far can we go before it loops back on itself, causing a space-time anomaly that forms a psychic feedback destroying our true sense of self?
Maybe I’m being a little over-dramatic.
Any way you slice it, we’re definitely flying by the seat of our pants. This isn’t something Brian and I worked out in advance. So it will be an interesting little tightrope walk.
Originally, I thought I would do one rebuttal comic, but now I’m starting to wonder if I can’t do a little story line with this! What do you guys think? Do you want to see Brian and I continue to warp and twist each other’s illustrated personas for our individual comics? It could be fun!
Leave your comments below. If you have any dirt I can use against Brian in my next comment, leave those in the comments section as well. ;D
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So I know that today’s comic isn’t fall-down funny, but it adds a nice little bit of progression to the plot and adds a dash of relationship conflict between Tom and Cami. I always jump at the opportunity to develop their relationship further, even if it’s only by a tiny increment.
So I guess now we’re in the thick of a “crossover” between Theater Hopper and Instant Classic. Although I don’t know if you can really call it a crossover, since we’re not sharing a storyline. I’m not sure what you would call it other than one artist gently making fun of the other in tandem with each other.
It’s funny, because I didn’t really intend for this to happen. I had only wanted to return fire from the comic Brian Carroll originally posted on his site on Sunday.
But then Brian posted a second comic and now a THIRD comic and I couldn’t let it slide.
Of course, it doesn’t help that you guys are egging me on from the sidelines. Your blood lust knows no bounds! Certainly, we are no better than the Romans…
I kid, I kid. This is all in good fun and a good way to beat back the January to February doldrums – when there are no new movies in theaters worth talking about. I mean, c’mon. Would you rather I do this, or do a comic about When In Rome? I know what I’d rather be doing…
Brian says that his next comic will be his last featuring his loutish parody version of Tom. I’m not sure if my version of Brian will extend beyond this Friday’s comic or not. I have a few ideas on how I can exaggerate my parody further, but we’ll have to wait and see. I wouldn’t want the gimmick to wear out its welcome. And besides, it looks a little mean when one guy is making fun of the other and the other guy is, like, “Yeah, I’m doing something else now?…”
That’s all for the blogging today. Thanks for swinging by the site. If you have any thoughts / reactions to our little feud, please post your comments below!
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Well, here’s part three in the quasi-crossover I’m having with Brian Carroll and his strip, Instant Classic. Brian wrapped up his arc yesterday placing his version of Tom at the transformative genesis of one of his lead characters in her past. Pretty cool. Kind of hard to live up to. Sincere thanks to Brian for including me.
I like the version of Brian that I’ve created for my story arc, but I have a nagging feeling like I could have pushed it further or been a little more incendiary. It’s hard for me, though, because it goes against my nature to be outwardly mean when it comes to my contemporaries – even if they invite the onslaught as Brian has. Brian has been a great sport and has actively encouraged me to go for the jugular. I’m just saying it’s difficult to slip into that headspace. It’s actually one of the reasons I don’t draw more guest strips. I have a pathological fear of misrepresenting what someone else has invested their lives into creating.
I know that I have no problem being mean about certain actors, directors or movie franchises featuring 30 foot tall transforming robots. So there is a little bit of hypocrisy at work here. But it’s a lot easier to make fun of something you don’t respect as opposed to something you do.
At this point in the storyline, I kind of feel like I would be telling the same joke over and over again by demonstrating the ways in which TH-Brian is annoying to Tom. I would kind of like to see their confrontation spill over into violence for the catharsis alone. But right now, things are pretty one-sided. If I decide these two should come to blows, the focus shouldn’t exclusively be about how Tom finds him irritating. That’s assault. But if there has always been something about Tom that TH-Brian has hated as well… then we might have something.
Sorry. I feel like I’m working this out in front of you guys and not leaving very much mystery to the proceedings. I guess I don’t know what else to write about. Things might pick up a little next week, though. I have a joke for From Paris With Love that I’ve been dying to use for two weeks.
Not much more for me to talk about. I hope you guys have enjoyed the comics this week – and the peek inside my head, apparently. See you here on Monday!
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