I totally bungled this comic last night as I was drawing it because I couldn’t figure out how to draw a pig that looked right. You’d think me being the Iowa boy that I am, I would have a library of pig references to draw from. Not the case. I live in the suburbs.
Anyway, it is fact that actor Rupert Grint contracted a case of swine flu recently. He’s okay now, but when I heard that news, there was no way I wasn’t going to work it into the comic somehow.
As I lay daydreaming yesterday, the thought of a vomiting pig entered into my mind and it’s pretty much impossible NOT to go forward with that kind of thing once it worms its way into your brain.
I think if I had to choose, Ron Weasley is probably my favorite character in the Harry Potter movies. Not just because the character is so pathetic, but because Rupert Grint does such a thorough job portraying him that way.
Grint as an actor is an underdog favorite of mine as well. I know he’s acted in a few things beyond the Harry Potter movies, but just looking at the guy and acknowledging his hangdog, unconventional looks – I’m pretty sure the gravy train is going to end for him once the last Potter film leaves theaters.
Daniel Radcliffe… Emma Watson… they’ll still have careers. If Grint lines up acting work after Harry Potter, I will be truly surprised.
Not much else for me to talk about today. Well, except that I heard through the grapevine that a movie starring Forest Whitaker, Elijah Wood and Adrien Brody called The Experiment is shooting here in Des Moines and they’re looking for extras in a protest scene at the state Capital tomorrow night. Someone passed along an 800 number you can call to get information about participating. They need about 300 people and I’m going to see if I can get in on the action.
I’ll let you know if anything develops on that front.
Otherwise, I might post some more trailers and stuff to the site soon. You guys really seem to be digging that, so I’m game if you are!
Talk to you soon!
If you’ve been following me at all on Twitter or Facebook the last couple of days, you’ll know that I was in an accident that required a trip to the emergency room and 11 stitches on the top of my left hand. My right hand is my drawing hand and I can still hold a pencil. But there will be no new comic today because I don’t want to push my luck. I want to take this time to heal.
Instead of a comic, I decided to tell the story of how I nearly lost a thumb. Please excuse any spelling errors you might come across. Since I’m down one hand, it’s taking me twice as long to write this blog post.
Since I’ve been off work, the need for little projects to keep me busy is at an all-time high. A few months ago, I bought a book about woodworking and building simple shelves. In it, there was a project detailing how one might build custom shelves for your garage or storage room. I thought it was the perfect opportunity to give it a try.
Basically, the shelves were two sets of 2 x 4s facing each other with grooves cut into them. Inside the grooves, you insert a sheet of plywood cut to fit and use that as the shelf.
To cut the grooves into the 2 x 4s required the purchase of a hand-held router, which I did on Tuesday. Since there wasn’t room in my car, I didn’t buy the materials needed to build the shelves. I decided I would go back the next day to get them.
Before leaving on Wednesday to buy the materials, I decided to give the router a spin (so to speak) so I had an idea of how it worked before I started the project in full.
I took the tool out of the box and read the directions. I inserted the 3/4″ bit required for the grooves and plugged in the tool. I took a scrap 2 x 4 from another project and set it on a pair of saw horses to use as my test material.
Here is where I made two key mistakes. First, I didn’t secure the scrap material to the saw horses. I didn’t lock it down. It was loose. Second, I didn’t insert the 3/4″ bit far enough into the router.
Because the bit was not inserted far enough into the router, it wasn’t cutting the wood. The stem of the bit was rubbing up against the wood causing resistance.
I took my left hand off the router and placed it on the scrap 2 x 4. I pulled the router away from the wood with my right hand at the same time I was releasing the trigger to stop the bit from spinning. As the bit nearly cleared the wood, it caught the edge of it. *BIP-BIP-BIP!* It skipped down the length of the board pulling my right arm with it.
In the blink of an eye, the router went over the top of my left hand.
At first I thought I had nicked myself, it happened so fast. I put the tool down and looked over at my left hand. Blood. Oh, wait. Dripping blood. Oh, my! That’s a lot of blood!
I clamped my right hand over my left and ran into the house. My first thought was to rinse out the cut. I put my hand in the sink and turned on the water. I looked down at my hand as the water ran over it. Blood gushed out of it like a bathtub spilling over. I remember shrieking “OH, GOD!!” and immediately grabbing a dishrag to wrap up my hand.
What I thought was a simple cut was quite clearly a deep wound. The picture of my bandaged hand above does not communicate the severity of my injury. Instead, look at this illustration:
The wound was about 5 to 6″ long, about 1.5″ wide, very jagged and very deep. It scared me enough to call 911.
Within seconds I was on the phone with dispatch. They asked me to describe the wound, if it was deep, how much blood I lost and instructed me to put pressure on the wound. He put me on hold as he notified emergency responders.
Meanwhile, Truman, oblivious to the trauma I had caused myself, goes to the back door. *TAP, TAP* He wants to be let out. In my mind I’m thinking “How am I going to get him back into the house?” I tell him “No, Truman.”
*TAP, TAP* Insistently, he scratches at the back door again. “I can’t deal with this,” I think and let him out anyway.
Dispatch came back on and immediately I thought that I should call Cami. I expressed as much to the dispatch operator, but he insisted that he stay on the line with me until help arrived because he didn’t know how much blood I had lost.
In the distance, I could hear ambulance sirens. “I can hear them,” I said. “They’re close.” I went to the front door to check.
As I approached the door, there was a pounding behind me. *BAM! BAM! BAM!* “POLICE!” A police officer entered the house through our garage. He was on patrol in the neighborhood when he got the call. It had been about a minute since I first called 911.
He started asking me a dozen questions. Mostly he wanted me to gather up my ID, my keys and my phone. He wanted to know what he could do to help me lock up the house.
At this point, I was kind of in denial. “Lock up the house,” I thought. “I’m not going anywhere!”
But I obliged the officer as he helped bring Truman back into the house and led him into his crate. By the time I retrieved my wallet, keys and phone, the ambulance was outside. I walked into the driveway to meet them.
They had me climb into the back of the ambulance to take a look. They removed the blood-soaked rag around my hand. Again, the gaping wound stared back at me. The put a gauze pad on top of it, wrapped up my hand and we were off to the hospital.
At this point I was glad to be in the hands of professionals, but I was still kind of in denial over the severity of my injury. I thought I would sit on one of the little benches in the back on our way to the hospital. I was fine! No need to strap me to a gurney!
They strapped me to a gurney.
Good thing, too. Because as they started driving, I became very light-headed. I started sweating and felt like I was going to throw up. They put me on oxygen and took my blood pressure repeatedly. My hands went numb. I was getting very sleepy. I was probably *this* close to passing out.
Fortunately, before all of this drama took place, I managed to call Cami at work to let her know I was on my way to the hospital. She was in a meeting, so I left her a message. By the time we arrived in the ER, she had returned my call and was on her way.
As I waited, they unwrapped my hand to take a look. It was at this point that I really started to fear that I had done permanent damage to myself. As we waited for the attending physician to come by with her opinion, they kept my hand sterile by submerging it into a pan of soapy water. It felt like someone lit my hand on fire.
Eventually the attending physician came by to offer her diagnosis. She asked me to move my fingers. She asked me to bring my thumb closer to my palm. Cheerfully, she said that the wound was superficial, that I hadn’t done any permanent damage to myself, but that I would probably need stitches. Now all I had to do was wait for someone to come in and stitch me up.
By this time, Cami was in the ER room with me and there was nothing I could do but sit there and look stupid. I felt so embarrassed. I had become another at-home accident statistic. I felt bad for dragging Cami out of work, for wasting her time, for being stuck with such an idiot husband. But at the same time, I was so glad she was there to see me through it. I would have been very scared without her.
Here’s my thing: I hate needles. I can’t stress that enough. I *HATE* needles. I freak out whenever I have to get blood drawn. I’m not even very good about getting a flu shot. So the idea of someone sticking needles in my hand to numb it up, then stabbing my hand repeatedly to run stitches through it filled me with great anxiety.
I’ve managed to live 31 years without ever having a trip to the ER to get stitches, mend a broken arm or anything of the kind. You can imagine that all of this was a little overwhelming for me.
Finally a resident came in to stitch me up. He numbed my hand and went to work snipping away some of the jagged pieces of flesh that would have prevented the stitches from being flush. I refused to look as he sewed up my hand, but I could feel him tugging at my arm. I could hear the sound of the stitch as it was being pulled though my hand, like someone lacing a shoe. It took everything I had not to jerk my arm away and run home in horror.
As the resident worked, Cami looked on. She’s much better about this kind of thing than I am. She’ll channel surf past Discovery Heath and watch someone having kneecap survey no problem. Meanwhile, I have to leave the house, drive to the woods and cry.
Later, Cami told me that my hand “looked like hamburger,” that the wound bled considerably and that the resident used “a lot of gauze” to soak it all up. Thanks, honey.
Half-way through the procedure, the resident asked me if I’d like to take a look. I told him if there was more work to be done, I didn’t want to see it. For me, it’s all psychological. I can’t know what you’re doing. I prefer to think it’s not even my hand that you’re working on.
As the resident continued to work, nurses and doctors came in and out to observe. “That looks really good,” they said. “Great job!” A man in a white overcoat joked “Not bad for his first stitch job, huh, sir?”
“Doooon’t… do that to me,” I said, desperately trying to cling to my sense of humor.
When it was all said and done, they put 11 stitches in my hand. Again, the resident asked me to look at his work and I sensed a need for approval. “It looks very straight,” I said. And it did, which was amazing considering how jagged the wound was.
The resident patted my leg, said “Take care” and exited the room. I told him “Thank you! I appreciate it! as he walked out, but was left with the impression that he was annoyed that I did not give him more praise for his effort. I felt bad.
Cami and I left the hospital to pick up Henry from day care. He was very good natured about the whole thing and, of course, asked lots of questions. We explained to him that Daddy had an accident and took a ride in an ambulance. “Wee-ooo-wee-ooo,” he questioned, as he mimicked the sound of ambulance sirens.
“Do you feel better, Daddy” he asked. “I feel better,” I said. “You feel better and the owie goes away from you,” he said. This kid gets it.
We cleaned the blood out off the kitchen floor and out of the kitchen sink. But where I cut my hand in the garage still looks like a murder scene. There was a lot more blood in there than I thought there was. Drops all over the floor. A light splatter draped across my work bench – enough blood to drip and pool below.
I pretty much spent the rest of Wednesday night and all day Thursday with my hand on ice and elevated above my head. I didn’t do much of anything else. I ended up watching The Boondock Saints and part of Man On Fire before I fell asleep. I spent the rest of my time feeling the pulse of my heartbeat in the palm of my hand.
I changed the dressing on my hand for the first time last night. I almost barfed. I get my stitches out next week. I’m not looking forward to it.
When it’s all said and done, it could have been much worse. I could have mangled my thumb. I could have twisted up the tendons in my hand like spaghetti noodles around a fork. I could have ended up with a dead hand.
People suffer worse injuries all the time and some don’t see it through the other side. But like I said before, this was all a first for me, so it felt like a big deal.
2009 has been a tough year so far. I’ve watch friends lose jobs, go through divorce, suffer miscarriages and some lose their lives. I lost my job and nearly lost my hand. Sometimes I wonder how much bad stuff has to happen before something good comes along.
But I realize that I have a lot of good in my life that I experience every day. I have a wonderful family, good friends and people who care about me. The hand thing is a minor setback, but this too shall pass. And you’d better believe that no matter how bad you think you have it, someone always has it much, much worse.
If nothing else, this accident could be the universe telling me to slow down a little and appreciate what I have more – something I think all of us are guilty of from time to time.
Meanwhile, the best thing for me now is to take a little time, rest and recover. I want to say thanks to the people that have shown support and hopefully I will be back up to speed making comics again soon!
Best wishes and take care!
First I just want to say thanks to everyone who wrote a comment or sent an e-mail expressing support or concern after I shared the story of my hand injury last week. I’ve always maintained that Theater Hopper fans are some of the most courteous, supportive and understanding fans in all webcomics and your words encouraged me to get back on the horse that much faster.
That said, a few of you were teasing me a little bit when it came to my hand injury being similar to that of Shia LaBeouf’s while he was filming Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. A bit of karma played against me for giving the actor such a hard time in the past.
It’s cool, it’s cool. While my injury was nowhere near as serious as LaBeouf’s, turnabout is fair play, I suppose. I gotta give LaBeouf credit, though. He showed up for work with his injury. I don’t know if I would have done the same.
Then again, if a $200 million action sequel were resting on my shoulders and Michael Bay could provide a kevlar cast that looked like skin, I’d probably find the proper motivation to go back to work.
A few of you suggested that I write my injury into the comic. While I recognized that it would be therapeutic to do so, I wasn’t sure how to go about doing it. Then I got an e-mail from one CP Newcombe who gave me a nugget of a great idea. Immediately upon reading it, I could think of at least five different directions to take the storyline. So you have CP to thank for this next little story arc that not only bring Shia LaBeouf back into the Theater Hopper, but another long-lost character once thought dead. Who could it be? You have to wait to find out!
I things that are not hand-related, Cami and I saw Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince over the weekend. Cami didn’t like it because she felt the film took too many liberties with the book and was hard to follow. She recognizes that certain changes had to be made to adapt the book to the screen, but was ultimately disappointing.
I, on the other hand, was perfectly happy with the movie and I attribute much of that to the fact that I’ve never read a single Harry Potter book.
I tried reading the first book before the first movie came out, but I found Rowling’s use of language too impenetrable and annoying to bother to continue. It’s all the made up words. They distracted me.
So, as a result, my exposure to Harry Potter has occurred exclusively in the domain of film. Aside from the fourth movie (which I thought was horrid), I’ve enjoyed them all so far.
I suppose now that I’ve had some time to get away from the movie a little bit, there were some things about The Half-Blood Prince that bothered me. Certain revelations that should have a large impact simply don’t shock the way they should and there’s a little too much hemming and hawing over the multiple romantic subplots to keep the tension going.
Something I’ve noticed about the last few films is that their visual tone has become darker and darker, but the plot elements don’t always match up to this. Things should be getting deadlier and more serious for Harry, but the films seem to force this balance with the light stuff which then feels out of place.
I know Joe had some pretty strong opinions on the movie, so I’m sure we’ll debate these issues and more on tonight’s episode of The Triple Feature. I strongly encourage you to listen live at 9:00 PM CST. You can participate in the chat field with the other listeners and we always have a lot of fun. Plus, you get to the listen to the behind-the-scenes stuff before and after we record the show. I’ve been told by some it’s the sole reason they listen to the live broadcast.
Hope you can fit us in tonight and that everyone has a great week. Thanks again for all your support and I’ll talk to you soon!
This has nothing to do with the comic. But it’s a funny little story related to my hand injury that just popped into my head that I thought you would enjoy.
This took place last Thursday, the day after my visit to the ER. I wasn’t doing much of anything that day except sitting around with an ice pack on my hand, admonishing myself, going “Owie, owie, owie, you stupid muther…”
At some point in the afternoon, there was a knock on my door. I went upstairs to see who it was and it was a solicitor.
A clean-shaven middle-aged man with a handful of pictures informed me that he was going door-to-door asking home owners if they would appreciate his business painting their house numbers on the curb in front of their homes.
“Perhaps you’re familiar with our work,” he asked, as he flashed a series of photographs in front of me. Most of the photographs were of plain house numbers. But some of them were also adorned with the logos of popular sports teams. A Chicago Cubs logo here, a Kansas City Chiefs logo there.
“No, I’m afraid I’m not familiar with your work,” I said.
“You know, the real reason you want to get your numbers painted on the curb,” the man said as he continued his pitch, “is because they’re much more visible to emergency vehicles. These emergency vehicles can’t see the house numbers when they’re so far away from the street.”
“That’s funny,” I said, holding up my bandaged left hand, “because we actually had a little situation here yesterday that required a visit from an emergency vehicle and they seemed to find the house just fine!”
“Uh? Oh! Oh my,” the man stuttered.
“I’m not trying to give you a hard time,” I said. “I understand what you’re doing. But I don’t think we’ll be in need of your services.”
We wished each other well and the man went on his way.
A couple of people expressed interest in seeing a photo of my stitches. So, while changing the dressing on my hand last night, I snapped a shot and posted it from my Twitter account.
It’s not for the faint of heart, so I’m not posting the image here in the blog. But if you follow this link, you can see the damage I did to myself.
Enjoy?
Sorry, guys. Today’s blog post is very short. I was up late last night working on the comic and had to be out the door early to go have my car worked on.
In the meantime, here’s a link to the comic where Jared – not Tom – smashed Shia LaBeouf’s hand with a hammer.
Also, if you’re somewhat new to the strip (or simply don’t remember the character) start here to get acquainted with David. He was introduced and killed off rather quickly. So if his appearance doesn’t ring any bells, I wouldn’t be surprised.
Beyond that, trust that this storyline is actually going somewhere and I might be back later in the day with some more updates.
Cheers!
My long ordeal is over.
After taking Henry to day care and dropping Cami off at work this morning, I went back to the hospital where I went when I had my accident last week to have my stitches taken out.
I’ve pretty much been a big baby through this entire ordeal and at one point Cami said she wanted to be in the room when they took my stitches out to support me. It’s a touching gesture, really. But I didn’t want to waste her time and insisted she go to work instead.
I actually became somewhat comfortable with the stitches in the last few days. Well, aside from the itching. But that was a good thing because itching means healing!
I was nervous about getting the stitches out only because I didn’t know if they were going to hurt or not. I’ve never had stitches before, so I had no frame of reference. I’m happy to say it was no big deal. Just a little tug. It feel like someone was tweezing the hair off the top of my hand.
I was nervous after checking in, though. I thought they would just sit me down and do it. Instead, they took me into triage, had me lay down on a gurney, took my temperature, took my blood pressure and put that little heart monitor clip on the tip of my finger. “Is all of this necessary, I thought?
But I guess it was all just standard procedures they were following. In the end, it wasn’t the second round of trauma I anticipate it to be. I even watched as they took out the stitches! That’s a big improvement over nearly vomiting and passing out a week ago!
So now I can go back to life pretty much as it was before. I don’t have to wear a bandage, I can get my hand wet. Basically keep it clean and wait for it to become a scar.
Oh, and what a scar it will be. I took another picture of my hand without stitches. You can see it here. I pretty much plan on telling people I got in a fight with a grizzly bear to explain it from this point forward.
In the meantime, I wanted to say thanks again to all of you who sent well wishes. I was impressed by how fast this wound healed and I have no doubt your support played a large role in that.
So, thank you.
I feel kind of weird because I feel like there isn’t much for me to blog about in relation to this storyline. I always get this way. There’s nothing here to explain except for what’s in the comic. I can’t go into much more detail without exposing plot points later on.
I suppose I can address one question a reader left in the comment field regarding Wednesday’s comic. I was asked how Shia LaBeouf could have confused Tom for Jared after the hand-smashing episode if Tom was never at the scene. It’s a fair question. At the risk of being completely opaque, I will say that Shia’s confusion will be explained soon. Don’t worry. This little mini-arc will be done soon.
I already have a joke in mind about The Ugly Truth, which is coming out today. It’s been really funny to watch Cami and her reaction to this film. She hates the commercials for this thing – says it looks awful. Part of me think she’s reacting to the obvious and hackneyed plot any movie-goer could decipher in 5 seconds. I think the other half of her scorn is just watching Katherine Heigl on screen.
If you follow celebrity gossip at all, Heigl has burned a lot of bridges with her diva-like behavior. Pretty much a classic example of a star thinking they have some kind of pull when they’re not famous enough to get away with it.
My parents have offered to watch Henry Saturday evening, so I think Cami and I are going to try and catch something, at least. I have my eye on Moon, the sci-fi movie with Sam Rockwell. Cami thinks it looks scary, so we’ll probably end up seeing Food, Inc. instead.
I’ve been hearing some pretty interesting things about Food, Inc. Basically, that after watching it, you’ll never buy anything that isn’t locally produced again.
Considering my terrible eating habits, Food, Inc. could end up being twice as scary as Moon could ever be!
That’s about it for me right now. I know everyone is at San Diego Comic Con right now, but my mind is on Chicago Comic Con coming up in two weeks. I’m putting together 1″ pins for giveaway and a press kit I can hand out to people who stop by the booth. It’s good to have a goal.
Speaking of goals, before I leave, I want to point out the t-shirt pre-order goal I have at the top of the page. We’re half-way to the 50 orders I need by the end of the month. If you’re at all thinking about buying a shirt or a book, please do so now! If you want to float a donation my way, every little bit helps! I could really use your support before going to Chicago Comic Con!
Thanks again, guys! Have a great weekend and I’ll see you here on Monday!
To me this comic is funny not because Jared doubts Tom’s story about being assaulted by an anthropomorphic piece of audio/visual equipment. Instead he finds the story questionable because Tom’s injuries are not consistent with the length of his beating.
Hate to spell it out for you, but it makes me smile.
I’m coming to a close on this little story line, so I hope you’ve enjoyed it. Not much for me to talk about except that Cami and I saw neither Moon OR Food, Inc. Saturday night as my parents had Henry stay over at their place. Neither of us could muster up the enthusiasm for Food, Inc. and we missed the only showing of Moon that evening before we left my parents house.
Instead we watched my review copy of I Love You, Man on Blu-ray. I’ll be reviewing it for the site and you can expect to find it here tomorrow. I’ll be sure to remind you on Twitter in case you forget.
I’m sure my lack of commitment to new movies will get me in trouble with Joe and Gordon tonight during our recording of The Triple Feature at 9:00 PM CST, but we’re probably going to talk about 500 Days of Summer, which isn’t even in wide release here until Friday. So what can you do?
I’m kind of annoyed because both 500 Days of Summer AND Funny People come out here on Friday and I can’t see either of them because Cami will be out of town with her Mom and Sister celebrating my Mother-in-Law’s birthday. I guess I’ll have to get caught up in the week before the Chicago Comic Con.
If you’re looking for something to do between now and The Triple Feature at 9:00 PM CST, I encourage you to swing over to my good friend Zach Miller’s web comic which you might remember is called Joe and Monkey.
I’ve been talking to Zach lately and he’s been drawing panels like a fiend preparing for JaM’s return. If I’m not mistaken, he’s already several weeks ahead and plans on updating every Monday, Wednesday and Friday for the foreseeable future.
It brings me great joy to make this announcement because I am constantly being approached by Zach’s fans about when he is going to bring Joe and Monkey back. Zach and I are friends and speak on a semi-regular basis, but I’m usually as much in the dark about this subject as the rest of you. So I always feel like I’m disappointing the person asking the question when I can’t give them a definitive answer.
But Zach is back on the horse and updating again. So be sure to swing by Joe and Monkey to see what he’s up to.
Incidentally, Zach and I will be sharing a table on Artist’s Alley at Chicago Comic Con August 6 – 9. You can find us at table #3414. If you plan on attending the show, it would mean a great deal to both of us if you came by and said “hello.” We are both very friendly and will likely chat your ear off.
Cheers!
I knew at some point I wanted Tom’s fantastic story to be uncovered as a lie. In terms of bringing David “back,” it was really the best of both worlds. I got to dust off an old character without actually keeping him in continuity.
It was also a great way to cover any gaps in logic there might be. People asked pretty early on how Shia could possibly mistake Tom for Jared when they’ve never even met. Frankly, I never thought that was something that would come up. I should have my characters lie more often! It’s the perfect catch-all solution!
I realize that the punchline to today’s comic is kind of “hur-hur,” but the great thing about it is that it was something literally said by real-life Jared after I posted to my Facebook page about my adventures in the ER. At the time, I kind of groaned at the pun. But now I appreciate it for what it is. Thanks, good buddy!
Not much else for me to talk about today except if you’re trying to find Monday’s recording of The Triple Feature, we had to scrap the show. Joe had to back out for personal reasons and that left us at a disadvantage. Joe and Gordon were going to talk about 500 Days of Summer but I haven’t seen it yet because it doesn’t come out in theaters here until Friday. No offense to Gordon, but it would be kind of a boring show if he was the only one talking about the movie (and I think he’d be the first to agree with me on that point.)
The other thing I’ll mention is that my good friend Zach Miller from Joe and Monkey found the floor map for Chicago Comic Con so now you’ll know where to find us on Artist Alley. Zach and I will be sharing table #3414 and we’ll be standing right next to our friend Joe Dunn and the rest of the Digital Pimp Crew at table #3416.
If you’d like to view the map, you can do so here.
Chicago Comic Con is being held at the Rosemont Convention Center in Rosemont, IL August 6 – 9. If you’re in the area, please stop by our booth. It would be a thrill to meet you and I’m giving out free buttons!
Until then, stay frosty!